What I needed on the journey to finding my voice
The Beginning of @HeLa Voice
Before I realized expression was more than just words, my body had already been telling me the truth for years.
If someone had more experience, a higher title, or a more successful business, I would feel it instantly. A tightening in my spine. A quiet apology in my posture. Shame, unspoken but loud, rippling through me like an old reflex.
It did not matter how much I knew or what I had to offer. My body still told me I did not belong. Not because anyone said it, but because the conditioning ran deep.
Who are you to speak?
Over time, embodiment changed that.
Over the past ten years of running my business, I have been unlearning quietly and steadily in the background. Teaching movement, mindfulness, and posture while also learning how to truly use my voice. And more importantly, how to help others do the same. Especially those of us living/serving in a second language or who have been told in countless subtle ways that our voices do not belong.
I have been holding a vision: to help women uncondition their voices and nervous systems so they can move, speak, and stand with sovereign power. Then, through a beautifully serendipitous series of events…
I met Laila.
And that is how HeLa Voice was born.
Laila is a Brazilian sustainability and communication strategist. I am a bodyworker and mindfulness teacher. Different continents. Different languages. Same fire. What started as unfiltered voice notes between us turned into something real, a shared space to explore voice, expression, identity, and what it takes to speak up in a world that constantly teaches you to stay small.
For the past five months, we poured hours into this project. We stayed up late talking through ideas, ran a big survey (some of you may have taken it), and kept shaping the project into something powerful. So powerful, in fact, that it started to intimidate us. Resistance crept in.
If you have ever read The War of Art, you will remember what Steven Pressfield says about resistance: it shows up strongest when something matters most.
So we took a massive step back. Simplified. And chose to keep moving forward anyway, despite the resistance.
This project has become an initiation for me too, not just into speaking more boldly in English, but into reclaiming my voice in Farsi. Even though it is my mother tongue, using it has often felt complicated. Heavy. Loaded with expectations and history. But this work, this shared exploration, has been helping me meet it again with curiosity. That curiosity even led me to start my Farsi YouTube channel.
Recently, Laila wrote me a public letter reflecting on our journey so far. It was honest, generous, and grounding. She also asked me three powerful questions. So here I am, writing back.
1. If you never moved to Canada, how do you think your voice would be different today?
It is hard to say with certainty, because I truly believe that if a path is meant for you, you will find it no matter where you are. But I also know that moving to Canada, and especially starting my business, became a major catalyst for learning to speak up.
Using my voice, whether through writing, teaching, or speaking, has always felt like one of my biggest life tasks. It did not come naturally or easily. What really opened that door for me was The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron. That book gave me permission to write without judgment, and that daily writing practice became the greatest gift. It helped me meet my voice on the page, first in private, before I ever felt ready to share it out loud.
Something I think about often is how learning English played a role in all this. English became a kind of neutral ground for me. It was not loaded with the same emotional and cultural layers as Farsi, so in some ways it made complex experiences easier to untangle. It simplified communication at a time when I needed clarity.
But it also forced me to get very clear about what I wanted to say. I could not rely on the nuance or rhythm of my first language to carry the emotion. I had to be more intentional. In that sense, the language shift became a training ground for expression.
So while I may have found my voice in any location eventually, moving to Canada gave me the conditions and the discomfort I needed to really start listening for it.
2. What do you think people are missing when it comes to self-expression?
Everyone carries insecurities about how they sound or how they look. We only begin to move through them when our purpose becomes louder than our insecurities. When something matters more than being accepted, your passion starts to speak through you, and people can feel it.
It does not have to be about saving the world. If that is your path, beautiful. But for those who feel numb or unsure, you can start by speaking for someone you love.
For me, I choose to speak because I can, on behalf of the women who came before me and could not. Not because they lacked the desire, but because their silence was necessary for their survival.
3. What’s a proud moment where you used your voice fully?
Even though I can think of many moments where I got to lead big rooms, over 200 people, feeling fully in my body, being myself, and genuinely enjoying it, I would still say the hardest moments have always been with the people closest to me, especially my parents.
This last trip to Iran was different. For the first time, I felt truly embodied in those intimate, often charged spaces. I shared uncomfortable experiences and spoke honestly and lovingly, even when it was difficult. That felt like a breakthrough.
I believe what we are teaching through HeLa Voice will be incredibly practical for professional settings, but just as powerful for personal, emotionally complex conversations, especially when old triggers are in the room.
I am not saying I have it all figured out. But spending three weeks with my family, all under the same roof, and being able to speak my truth without collapsing into old patterns of shame, guilt, or feeling deeply misunderstood, that felt like a huge moment for me. That was a version of full voice I had been working toward for a long time.
And now, I’ll pass the questions back:
What helps you speak up when you’re not sure how it’ll land?
Has learning to write in your mother tongue changed how you express yourself in English?
3. Where in your life are you still shrinking that maybe… you don’t have to anymore?